so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I queefed so loud it echoed.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize