Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize