I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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