glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize