i just had sex bonerless
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
