So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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