'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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