Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize