your thong is hanging out like whoa
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize