i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
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