Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I would fuck him just for his dog
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
