Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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