awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize