I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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