I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
