Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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