I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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