But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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