so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
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