That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
