he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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