I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize