im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
people are starting to question the shark bite story
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
