I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
