so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
