i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
