omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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