I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
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I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
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A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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