just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
