There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
