Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
