i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize