Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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