Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize