she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize