Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize