I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
