So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
