So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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