i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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