i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
