I'm jealous of your bromance
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
