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Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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