Just mADE A PArabola og urine
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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