you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
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It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
either way he was missing a nipple.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
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They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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