508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
