let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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