You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
