So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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