people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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