where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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